Back to Bloggin'!

A new husband, two new teeth, five pounds, and one big mess later... I'm blogging after a billion years of absence.  I have one thing to say.  I'm exhausted.  Since my last blog, Jarod has moved back home *finally* I got a visit from my BFF Britt, Jarod made an honest woman out of me, Sammy has acquired some chompers, and I got to meet some of my first live Amish (which turned out to be a disappointment.)  Let me tell you something, this is quiet a lot, so hopefully I'll be able to recap in the next few days while we take a "relaxing weekend" So I guess I can start at the beginning....

Jarod mozied (word?) on back to Ohio about two weeks before the wedding.... I was a crazy lady.  All I wanted him to do was teleport back to Oxford in the split second that he had packed up the truck and he didn't do it. Was that too much to ask?  To me, no.  Every time Jarod is traveling back to me, I always get this anxious feeling that he's taking his time, because he doesn't want to be back with me.  This might be caused by my lack of any real concept of time and space, but I go nuts on him every time.  Weird coming from the person who completely missed her flight to Minnesota last summer and had to wait a whole day to get there.  

Jarod packed up his truck to the MAX.  I couldn't believe The Law let him pass through, who knows how many states and hundreds of miles to get here.  So there was his life... all packed up and ready to merge with my mess.
I leisurely decided I would give some clothes away, for what might be the first time in my life.  I don't think I've gone through my wardrobe since high school, and I'm sure I didn't really give anything away.  I wear clothes from middle school on the reg, I know it's weird.  My hoarding ways need to stop as we live our lives like Irish Travelers  gypsies.  You do not even know how much anxiety I've had over giving away my clothes.  I have accumulated 6 13-gallon garbage bags of clothes to donate. (Do you think kids these days want authentic wear from the late 90's? I think it's coming back!)  This is after I've hidden several drawers worth of clothing that I might want to wear "some day" at my parent's house.  Jarod was a little shocked and worried when he saw my give away pile.  I think he second guessed marrying me at that point.  All of my drawers were still overflowing after I had gotten rid of the things I didn't need.  He should feel lucky.  I gave away my favorite pair of sweatpants (bright red, zippers on the bottom with an elastic waist) that he's constantly embarrassed about, because I will wear them twice a week in the winter.  I traded them in for my bright red scrub bottoms that are too big for me.  Equally as comfy, not as cool.
Jarod lived out of his bags for about a week before I decided I would give in a few drawers.  This took a lot of maneuvering and a lot more tears work, then he thinks. I did make him use Sammy's closet for his clothes... I can't make all the sacrifices in our relationship!  We've tried to merge as much as we can, but it's incredibly hard with all the things I've collected over the years, but we're trying.  I've decided that I would just bring the books I haven't read on my bookshelf with us instead of my entire library, for example.  Packing is going to be one of the biggest bitches I've encountered.  I'm a little anxious at this point and we have less than a month.  First big move to Minnesota.  Next stop? Who knows!

Did you know: Sometimes, when you think you smell a skunk outside, you might be sniffing the nearest fox?  They actually have an odor that is just as bad as the stink of a skunk!

Jarod Palmer on Facebook?

It's obvi way too early to be up right now for Vi Pham (I started this blog at 5:45 am), but Sammy is up. (Mother dearest took him from me) So now I'm stuck awake, with a sleepy headache and much on my mind per usual.

Let me just say, last night's episode of Mod Fam was hilarious.  I didn't watch last week's episode yet, and usually I like to watch them in order, but I just love that show and couldn't not watch last night.  Everyone had their doubts at first, but I think I've convinced about 10 people to start watching since I saw the first commercial for the pilot.  That's it. I'm watching again after I finish writing!

Jarod has made his triumphant return to Facebook.... hahaha.  Anyone who knows him, knows he can hardly open a web browser.  It took a very long time to teach him how to use Skype, and the only reason he really learned was so he could show me Minnesota the first summer that we dated (trying to get me to come.) and to try and learn how to multi-task in his garage.  I'm interested to see why he's on, what he plans on doing while he's on, and how often he plans on being on...does he even know what he's doing on here? haha I'll let you know.  I don't want this to turn into one of those "Vi Pham" tasks where I act as secretary and personal assistant.  As much as he praises me for that role, I don't need another thankless/payless job added to my roster.  Gotta gimme some pay, Mister!

It looks like he might actually read my blog instead of having me read it to him.  Really, it is about our lives, and usually about the conversations we have, so I guess he isn't missing out on much.  Much love to my honey bear!  I know he enjoys reading my writing as much as he loves hearing them over the phone.

I have successfully worn the same outfit all week... I have taken showers, but I also have not left the house since Saturday.  Sad and weird?  Yes. But the weather is terrible, and there is no reason for me to change out of something I'm comfy in.  Steve from Blues Clues never changed his outfit.  But I heard he got some flake for that after some kids refused to change their clothes because "Steve doesn't."

Sam, as of late, is most comparable to a puppy.  He spends countless hours pushing a ball around the house as he crawls around, exploring every nook and cranny of the house.  He has also taken quite a liking to playing with that door stopper thing that looks like a spring.  The other day, I let him play with it for maybe 15 minutes.  He loved it.  The only difference is, I don't have to walk him outside in this weather. I think it's actually frowned upon to walk your kid outside when it's raining.

He and I have a favorite show on Nick Jr.  It's quite good.  The Fresh Beat Band combines popular music beats with a kid friendly message that is pretty awesome.  There's also a little break dancing kid that actually is on a lot of rap music vids.  Fresh Beat Band must be his day job.  I was trying to find a video on youtube of Sam's favorite song on the show.  It's called Great Day.  This is the best I could find (and no, I didn't make it myself, I found it like this!):

I joined this online message board community about kids.  I joined because I thought I had to in order to read an article (I was wrong), and don't really use it at all, but I got an e-mail about baby proofing your house.  I was a little confused about one thing.  They were talking about using baby gates.  One mom commented that she likes to put a gate in front of the stairs, just in case her kid learns to climb out of their crib, they might fall down the stairs.... Really?  If your kid is climbing out of their crib and opening the bedroom door, do you think a gate is going to stop them from rolling down your stairs?  Most likely, you: 1. Have a lot more to worry about or 2.  Your kid is smart enough not to roll down the stairs and probably will walk over to your room and open your door to wake you up.  While I see why there is concern, I don't think she really thought the whole thing through.

In other news....

Jarod's team is currently 3-1 in the series and has another game on Friday in Hamilton, Ontario.  We're really hoping for a win right now!  The sooner this series is over, the sooner the next series begins, and the sooner Jarod can come home!  I'm working on a plane ticket for the championship series, but Jarod just smiles at me (through Skype) and says, "We'll see."  Obvi afraid of the curse.  He must really love me to marry me!  I'm seriously his worst luck charm.  haha.  Actually, I think I did pretty good his senior year of college.  He had the best season of his career, finished school with honors, and he signed with The Minnesota Wild...I mean, I did get pregnant that year, but I still blame Jarod for that little hang up. I guess that all didn't do so much with luck as just being supportive for him.  

For anyone that doesn't know me very well, this bad luck thing isn't just a joke.  I lost all my luck after that time in Edinburgh.  I used to be very lucky.

DISCLAIMER: I am also tagging Jarod in this post purely for selfish reasons.  I want more followers and obvi need to find a way to reach out. haha.  New readers =Yayy!  I try to be fun, and I have very bad punctuation, spelling and grammar.  I don't read over anything.  And I usually don't think very hard about what I want to say. Hope you like!... which reminds me... Avid Readers: if you like, tell your friends! Copy and paste the URL: www.thephalmers.blogspot.com   I love it when people know my business!  The more I know people are reading, the more I'll post.  

Did You Know: If you'd like to kill a cat, feed it raw egg whites.  It's a bit morbid, cruel, and evil, I know.  But I guess you could see this as "If you want to keep your cat alive, don't feed it raw egg whites." There's an enzyme in them that blocks something or another in the cat's metabolism mechanisms, then they can't produce ATP.  When this happens, they can't make energy and then will die.  Never let my little sister around cats and egg whites.  Thank you Erik Olsen for this science lesson! 

The Mommy is Getting Married.

That kinda sounds weird.  Probably because most mommies become mommies after they get married.  But. nbd.

It's just a little over a month until I'll be Mrs. Palmer.  Pretty sweet, except my name is going to sound weird.  I've been mulling over this for awhile now.  Vi Palmer, sound awk.  So I decided I'm going to start going by my full name.  Of course, all of my friends can still call me Vi, I just want strangers to start addressing me by Thuyvi.  Thuyvi Palmer as a balanced set of syllables that sound better.  We'll see how long I remember this, so it will catch on.

I FINALLY sent out my wedding invitations today, and I think my eyes are on fire.  I did almost all of it myself.  My little sister, Nga, helped a bit with stuffing and whatnot.  Mostly because I had no idea what to do with the 10,000 envelopes I was given... If you're getting an invitation, good luck finding the actual invite!  It's like one of those Russian Matryoshka dolls that's just plain frustrating.  You open one after another after another, just to get one of those disappointing mini dolls that, if you swallow, you'll probably die.  If I was good at origami, I would have folded up a little paper crane in each one.

While I've kept up with my part of the bargain for this little shindig, Jarod is struggling with his list of things to do.  I believe there are 3 or 4 things I've asked him to complete on his own.  And by own, I mean, nag him everyday about it.  Jarod doesn't seem to understand that we can't be married unless we have someone to marry us... Why doesn't that make sense to him? He thinks he has all the time in the world to find someone.  There's a long story that goes with all of that, but to shorten it up after much debating, we decided we wanted to have an actual ceremony for the wedding.  Then we ran into a problem when the person we wanted to marry us won't be in town.  I thought I solved the problem when my BFF Brittni got ordained and could perform marriages (baptisms, commitment ceremonies... you name is she does it!  Although, little did I know, that also meant she's obligated to report instances of child endangerment.  This puts me in a very awkward position with Sammy around her, but that's another story.)  But even with that, we run into several difficulties.  Kill me if after everything I've done we don't get legally married.  That would really be just my luck.

As many have asked, I did register for this union of matrimonial bliss.  Here they are!

http://www.amazon.com/gp/registry/wedding/2AW8JJTNMCR23
I also registered at Macy's. Just search our name!

Awk putting it out there like this, but I've been told I've had several inquiries, and I don't think I'll be having a wedding shower or anything like that to put it out there.

I must tend to my young bear now, so I'll be writing soon!

Did you know: On Valentine's Day, couples can get married at the Empire State Building for free?  I believe I read that somewhere weird.

A Man's Greatest Possession is a Sympathetic Wife - Fortune Cookie

-So, what are you going to do, now that you've graduated?

-Nothing!! haha

My long awaited salon day was a much needed relaxing day that I LOVE Jarod for pushing me to have for myself.  I may have spent a lot more than I should ever spend on someone else doing my toe nails and washing my hair, but I'll tell you something, I loved every minute of it.

So, the Aeros won Game 7, meaning they're on to Round 3 of playoffs ....aka at least another two weeks before I MIGHT see Jarod again.  This was definitely a bittersweet win in my book.  While I'm super excited for the team, I can't help but think how much this sucks.  Since graduation ( 5 days ago) I've been soo excited to the end of my tenure as single parent Vi Pham.  Sammy is seriously CRAZY these days, constantly crawling around, climbing, standing, and singing his brains out.  I'd like to throw him to Dad now, PLZ.  Jarod keeps hearing about all the things that are happening, but hasn't seen any of it in real life. I keep telling him the best solution is to fly us down, but he thinks I'm crazy... probably because I ask everyday.  He's says I'm bad luck... I'm not even allowed to watch the games online. HAHAHA

I've been attempting to finish up (aka a last minute start) to my wedding plans.  Within two days, I've rented all the serve ware and tableware, figured out what Sam will be wearing, booked a musician and photographer, purchased and received my engraved champagne flutes and cake servers, created my invitations and began making the mailing labels, and started (almost finished) my backyard flower and herb garden. hahaha Weddings? NBD.

What has Jarod done?  Asked me to make him a list of his things to do for the wedding (3 things) and sent me this youtube video :

That's what he'd like to re-create for our first dance...

I had something else in mind:

After I showed him my rendition of our first dance, he asked me why my BFF Brittni would be a part of our first dance... he obvi still doesn't understand yet. I love him. hahah

Jarod, at the root of his soul, may be one of the most innocent mentalities I've ever encountered. Throughout the time we've known each other, I am constantly shocked by the genuinely good nature Jarod has.  Maybe it's because I expected different from a hockey player, but Jarod has a softer side to him than me at age 6, (when I cried everyday when I realized I had to go to school all day and had to be away from my dad...I was also a little afraid of my special ed reading teacher)  I take it in stride and realize that the things Jarod means to say aren't the things I think they mean.  Mostly because I have a cold heart and rely solely on sarcasm to impress people. There is so much I have to explain to Jarod about the world, not because he's stupid, but because he just doesn't understand how people could have ill intentions.  I love and hate this about him, but I love him more than words.  All I can do when he has some shocking statement is smile and agree.  If I really wanted to change him, I wouldn't have the Jarod that I've met and fell in love with.

So when Jarod tells me he doesn't want me to come down to Texas because I might be bad luck, I know he doesn't not want me around.  I know its for the same reason he hasn't gotten his hair cut or shaved his face.  He's trying to win it all for me and Sam. And that's just alright with me.

But it's not going to stop me from asking! :)

The Return of Did You Know:
The month of May is Asian/ American South Pacific Islander awareness month?  Compliments of Nick Jr. hahaha

The Things I Miss

The past year has been a whirlwind of new things that has created a whole new me.  While I enjoy the company of my little bear, there is so much I miss about my old self.  I miss my supermodel hair, I miss bikini bathing suits and wearing shirts as dresses, I miss free time and thoughtless days.  But most of all, I miss Jarod.

In almost less than two months, we'll be back together in Ohio and getting ready to take the plunge into the married life.  It's interesting how we have our Sammy, we share everything, and for a time, we lived together and yet, I'm kind of nervous.  How different can it be?

Well, for starters, I can't overreact and tell him I'm leaving.  The legal proceedings of a divorce are too long and complicated for him to believe that I'd actually go through with all that just because we have a minor disagreement. (This is a joke, guys...but seriously.)

Jarod and I both have romantic notions of each other that never seem to be fulfilled.  We think very highly of each other.  But real life has never stopped us from trying our hardest to make the other person's dreams come true.  Jarod would do anything if it would mean I'd turn my frown upside down.  While, on some level, I wish I would have fallen in love with a musician/poet, I would pick my meathead of a hockey player any day.  And while Jarod thought he got a timid girl, who, as I found out yesterday, likes the outdoors (why would he ever think I did?!?) He chose me!  The surprising connection that brought the two of us together seems to have boggled the minds of anyone who knows us, but seriously, who really knows us? The only people who understand us are the two of us.  Add to that the crazy life of a hockey family and we look like a recipe for disaster, but I'd put money on us. haha

Do you ever find yourself listening to the radio, and you hear a song that reminds you of something that just takes you back to a moment in time that you can almost feel?  Lately, every time I hear a love song, it takes everything in me not to close my eyes (because I'm driving...DANGEROUS) and take a minute to remember Jarod holding my hand, or just being near.  I mean, how sappy is that?  It's not like he's in a coma or anything like that.  He's in Texas playing hockey.  If anything, he should be having the time of his life.  I believe this is all the product of too little sleep and too much baby Sam. BUT maybe I'm turning into a romantic.

Enough ramblings and back to school! Gotta finish semi-strong!


Did you know Ostriches are the only birds who have eyelashes?

Sorry Social Life, I Can't See You Tonight. I've Gotta Be a Mom

Let me clue you in on my pitiful life (jk jk, but seriously...)

It's Friday night, 10:52 PM.  I'm sitting here in front of the television watching Yo Gabba Gabba on silent, constantly refreshing the stats on Jarod's game (because I'm too cheap to purchase the video feed tonight, plus it sucks big ones to see it cut out every five minutes) with my empty cup of wine, contemplating whether or not I smell bad enough to shower.

P.S. Jarod scores on the one night I don't buy the damn game. Kill me.

Yes. My life has change just a bit.

There was a time when pitiful meant something completely different.  My BFF Brittni and I would scrap together our dollars (usually around 7 or 8) contemplate whether or not eating a real dinner was worth the extra money and go out to join some pub crawls, meet some nerds, hula hoop...whatever our hearts desired... starting at 4 pm lasting until who knows when (maybe with a trip to the library to pick up Jarod haha).  That sort of pitiful was, at least, fun. and we usually made a few dollars throughout the night.
Fun nights were posted on facebook within the month, and I shaved my legs on the reg.

Now, I get separation anxiety from Sam.  I seriously love the little bugger to death. If I don't have to leave him, I won't.  I feel like I really have no reason to, because I don't have anything friends anyway.  He's much more fun anyway.  We make animal noises, we play on the compy, and we love all the same shows (except I secretly suspect he likes watching Olivia, which I despise for her selfish ways). I love it! But then again, who would want to leave this cute little face? :)

Having said all of that, I think I'm ready for a little nap before Jarod calls me post-game. Let's hope for a win (or a loss. I'm not sure which one I want more yet)  Go Aeros!

Did you know: There are no words in the English dictionary that rhyme with the word "Month"?

Quiting Another Addiction

I'm quitting coffee.

I think starting to drink coffee might have been a top five worst decisions I've never made... and I blame Jarod.

When I met Jarod and we started dating, I obvi used studying as a way to hang out more.  More to my surprise, Jarod actually wanted to study instead of make out.  So I'd sit there, bored out of my mind on my computer, FBing, while he studied and would usually doze off for awhile (I can sleep standing up).  Every time I would come over, Jarod had a fresh pot of coffee.  Honestly... the stuff tastes like boiling hot bitter water to me.  Especially since the only way Jarod would offer it was black...no sugar, no cream.  If I didn't like him so much, I'd probably spit it in his face.  haha.  (But seriously....in February when my sister and I eat chocolates from the Valentine's day boxes, if I get one with fruit or coconut, I make a face and she sticks out her hand for me to spit it out.  We've been doing it since I was little, nbd)

Cut to Mommy: The Student.  As perfect as Jarod can be, coffee became my lover.  I had coffee in the morning, in the afternoon, even at night depending on what needed to get done.  Before you feel sorry for me, I'm seriously, the ultimate slacker so I wait until late night on the day before to get things done, so essentially, MY bad! (Emphasis on the "my") I seriously could stay up for days.  But now, I'm getting just a little worried.  I've been having these half awake half asleep moments where I can't tell the difference between dreaming and reality, I'm very irritable, and because drinking coffee made my appetite go away, I haven't been eating very well.  Those things alarmed me, but now I'm concerned.  My hair is falling out like whoa.  It's not because I stopped taking prenatals, because I never took them in the first place.  And this started happening very recently.  I could very well make a wig out of the hair that falls out in one day.  This has never happened before, and I'm afraid I might go bald.  Biggest fear aside from the government regulating TV consumption.  So, I'm stopping.  While I'm no longer a scientist, I could still play one on TV convincingly, so I decided that because the caffeine was draining my system more often (drink coffee= pee a lot), it was draining out the small amount of nutrition I was getting.  Thursday was awful, today was better.  But I also didn't have to do anything but hang out with Sam.  One logical alternative would be to take vitamin supplements.  Um, wrong.  I sure as hell will not swallow those.  Do I look like a drug mule?  I would gag and probably die.

I'm looking into some alternatives, but right now, I decided on a little arithmetic: 

[(Old Vi)+(Mommy Vi)]-[(Excessive Drinking)+(Mild Stupidity/Bad Decisions)]= V2k11

OMG amazing.

Every day is new so we'll seeeee :)

Did you know: The Fedex logo as an arrow between the "e" and the "x".  Thank you Ochocinco :)

Hey Babay! I Think I'm Gonna Marry You!

Sooo I picked up my supposed wedding dress on Saturday... seriously exhausting.  Apparently, when you get your dress fitted, you have to go THE shoes to go with THE dress for THE wedding.  Anyone who knows me knows how much I HATE shoes.   My feet make it impossible to like them.  They're ugly, wide, and flat.  They remind me of a duck's foot with Mr. Peanuts for each little(but long) toe.  We ending up going to EVERY store at the mall looking for THE shoes.  Today MY feet hurt.  I obviously need to lessons in being a bridezilla, but I don't have the time for that.  What I've learned, though, is that an easy-going bride is worse than a bride that knows exactly what she wants.  Everyone is always asking what you want EXACTly for THE things that will be remembered for your entire life.  Geez louise.  I just wanna be married!

I've been quite a douche bag to my family as of late.  Especially with this wedding business.  Besides having this blog as an outlet, I really keep to myself and I'm not very open to the opinion of others.  In my head, all of this wedding stuff can be easily done, and we can be happy, but in reality, it's a pretty hard business.  Feelings get hurt, disagreements happen, and when you think it's no big deal (nbd) you're really letting other people down.  As much as it's about you and your future spouse, it's supposed to be about your family, too.  As hard as it is for me to let them in on it, it's the way it's supposed to be.  But let me be honest, I just want to be married.  We're already a family!  I'd just be happy with signing the papers and calling it a wedding.  Thank goodness for sisters who are extreme Type A's.  When this is over I'll have some relief.

On a lighter note, I have a funny story to tell about getting my dress fitted.  It all starts with the bra fitting.  Keep in mind I just had a baby 6 months ago, and I hate my body right now.  I somehow forgot where I was going and wore maaaybe the oldest bra imaginable.  I also decided to wear my bodyshaper, because I have a few trouble areas that I hate.  Aaaand I of course don't bring a strapless bra with me, because, why would I?  So I pretty much get naked for this lady I don't even know, while she judges my little assets.  Kill me.  Later, I have to go all around the mall in my bodyshaper, which is making me sweat like crazy, and I have to pee.  Worst feeling ever.  So then, I put the dress on for a second time, and the very Russian seamstress was trying to figure out how to fit the dress to my anorexic frame. We are, of course, trying to figure out how to squeeze in the top.  My mom asked if they can just take in the back.... the Russian's response? "Problem not in the back, nice and snug.  Just empty in the front.  We need to put something there." Riiippppp.  Thanks, lady, for calling me out for my little boobies in front of all these people who are coming into the dressing room to look at my be-a-utiful dress.

Did you know:  Smarter people have more dreams?  The higher your I.Q. the more youdream

Are We There, Yet?

Today, I'm currently rocking a white v-neck under shirt that kinda smells like B.O. and probably has baby stains on it.  I'm only guessing (I haven't found any) because people keep looking at me weird. Also, my jeans smell funny.  There is a great likelihood that these pants haven't been washed since I got them (I do that).

I've had a rough couple of weeks.

Life has finally started to sink in, and I've gotten senioritis for the third time.  Only, now I'm dealing with pure exhaustion, not a Donkey Kong hangover.  We're reaching the finale of our separation as the hockey season comes to an end.  I'm really excited for this.  I'm super anxious for time to fly.  There are about three weeks until the regular season ends.  Apparently playoffs last through the end of June.  Unlike college hockey, they do a best of 7 tournament.  What. the. heck?  Not only is that annoying for me, I believe Jarod will be dead by then.  With what I believe are 4 rounds, that's a total of what, 28 games? (I'm no good at math...or english grammar, apparently.) I know this sounds horrible, but I really hope they lose quick.  Being by myself at this point in the semester has proved to be disastrous. I mean, I'm exaggerating, but Sammy and school are wearing me down.

Sam is the most social, crazy baby I've ever met.  He, honest to gosh, is always talking like mad, giggling and now, moving around during all his waking hours.  In order to curb any depression that might occur, I've been dancing and singing a one woman broadway musical for him every morning to make him happy.  It also prevents him from moving around too much and maaaaybe falling off the bed. Oops! (It hasn't happened yet, mom)  Maybe it's spoiling him to give him all of this attention all the time, but I'll be damned if Sam is sad because I was too tired to play with him.  Sooo I put on a smile and dance around while singing to Rihanna (his personal fave) while he sits there laughing at how crazy mommy can be.  I'll tell you something, the introverted part of me is exhausted and a little uncomfortable, everyday.

Another way to entertain Sam

Sam's Blue Steel will make me millions someday... obvi why I please him.

I was reading my old blog posts and I said that I probably wouldn't be writing about Jarod and Sammy so much, but I believe that's all I've been writing about.  I guess my life without them is really boring or I'm one of those people that make their family their world.  Which one's better, because I'll just say that one. But seriously, look at how cute this kid is?  Through my weirdo stories about him, I'm bragging, not going to lie.  I'm thinking that I'm not sure how Sam is going to turn out when he gets older and if I'll be able to brag the way I am now.  I suppose I'm just trying to get my money's worth while I can.  While obvi I hope he's as great as he is right now forever, you can't be sure.  I usually look at my glass half empty for the comedic purpose of life, I've gotta go with my perfect little bambino always being the best kid ever.

Did you know:  When attacked by an alligator, it's best to punch him right in the honker.  Also, that zigzag walking will probs get you killed.  Straight lines are best when you're on land.  

My Odd Little Baby

Today was the first day Sam has really smiled since we've been back in Oxford.  Maybe it's because we are finally treating the double ear infection that he never complained about, getting back into the routine of life while Mommy goes to school, or Patty the Platypus (most likely Patty), but one thing is certain... we hate Horrible Ohio right now.

Sam's second favorite Beanie Baby, and my first:

Patty the Platypus

She's seriously like 15 years old

 It breaks my heart to see how much he misses his dad. For a few days, he'd look around whenever we were obvi searching for Jarod.  The only thing that's made him happy are the few minutes Jarod talks to him over the phone.  Sam is currently sleeping on me while I write this at 1:30 in the morning.

That brings me to a topic that is slightly odd.  Sam likes his women big, round, and plump (Sorry, Gianna :) )  While Sam will obvi let me hold him and snuggle because I'm his mom, he is extremely uncomfortable on my skin and bone frame.  I honestly feel bad that I haven't kept on my baby fat weight.        The poor kid can't get comfy.  The second he sees a woman that is slightly bigger or has the pleasure of having ample breasts, he lunges for them and snugs up close.

We sat next to a woman on the plane back to Ohio who was slightly bigger.  Sam couldn't get enough of her.  He kept putting on his charm with his flirty smile and giggles.  Then he started rubbing her fatty arms trying to get her to hold him.  He's such a weirdo and obviously doesn't understand boundaries.  Coming from a kid who has had a sudden fear of strangers, he surely can't resist the women with some junk in the trunk.

Sam enjoys the comfort of a pillowtop mattress and can't get comfortable without a soft pillow. Maybe that's how he wants his woman too.  He's such a little diva... guess I should pack on the pounds.

There is one thing he doesn't complain about, apparently, pain.  Sam has his first aliment...the double ear infection.  The kid hasn't complained at all, really.  He has no fever, he eats like mad, and he stop his nervous tick of pulling on his ears 3 weeks ago!  For a second, I felt like a horrible mother, as she told me that it looked "really bad" and I had no idea this was going on.We were going in to check about his super yucky cough!  Really, Sam? No heads up?  He's always so happy and hasn't complained one bit.  We were on a plane for goodness sake!  He hardly cried, only when he was hungry, so instead of being mad at myself, I decided I'd be mad at him.

Here's another weird thing about Sam, while we're on the topic.  He loves Beanie Babies.  We have tons in storage at my parent's house.  Like every other family in the 90's, we jumped on the Beanie Baby band wagon.  We had the cases, the tag covers, and I was in the Official Beanie Baby Club.  When I was pregnant, my family joked about how all the crazy crap in the house we had would go to the grandkids.... aka unborn Sam.  I said something about how I didn't want the Beanie Babies.  My mom said, under her breath, that she was going to give them to her grandbabies.  Well crap, turns out, Sam loves them.  His cow that he can't sleep without?  Beanie Baby.

Sleeping with his cow

He chews on him like crazy when he sleeps and likes to twirl his tail around.  It's actually pretty adorable, but only because Sam is cute.  Deep down, there is a part of me that despises the fact that Sam is attached to something, but at least it's only when he sleeps.  He wants nothing to do with him during the day.  The problem is, he's starting to smell. I'm not sure if you can wash these little fake animals or not but something needs to be done.  I decided I'd try to get him to like something else.  Patty was my first Beanie Baby and my fave EVER.  So I stood there, Patty in hand, shaking her in front of Sam's face.  He was pretty excited, so I decided it was time:  I ripped the tag (obvi still with the plastic cover) off.  I actually hesitated.  Like it was going to be worth something "some day"  Seriously?  I contemplated, for a split second, about risking my son's life for the dollar worth of Patty the Platypus.  Is something wrong with me? I tried to get him to sleep with her instead of the cow, but it didn't work out.  Now she's his daytime playmate.   Dammit.

Did you know: Elephants are the only mammals that can't jump?

Spring Break, It's gonna be a crazy week!

Here's a shout out to my BFF Britt and Dad Beck on their marathon in Napa Valley today!!

We finally made it to Texas and I'm FINALLY getting a break from the chaos of school!  Actually, I just threw myself into a different type of craziness such is Jarod Palmer's life (last night, I took Christmas decorations down), but that's OK with me.  We had a semi-relaxing trip to Texas... Sammy semi-behaved himself.

We were the first to board, so we got to watch everyone else get on the plane, and I see tons of guys in suits.  One of them sits next to me, and I ask "Are you all going to a convention or something?"   Of course they aren't.  haha.  Turns out, they were the Syracuse Crunch, the team that Jarod was going to be playing that Friday.  Lucky us.  The trip turned out to be super awk.

Not only did Sammy continually rub the poor man's leg with his foot, he was watching a movie on his iPad, and Sam wanted to watch too.  He spent two hours leaned over trying to watch the movie with him (successfully) and tried to talk to him.  Of course the jerk continued to ignore the poor 5 month old.  What does Sam do? Get louder...and louder...and louder. He got so upset, he started to cry.  The only toy I brought on the plane was his butterfly, so I kept flapping it around, and Sam loved it, until it was his turn.  The poor butterfly went for quite a ride.  Sam sure did let him fly...right into the guy next to us.  That's what he gets for ignoring my baby!

Along this trip, Sam of course takes the opportunity to take biggest dump of his life.  Not one of the quiet ones either, he had a bit of a struggle and let everyone know what he was doing.  And of course he waited until 25 minutes til landing, meaning, we couldn't get out of our seats.  I honestly don't even know where you can change a baby on a plane.  Is that possible? He thankfully made it OK, and he was soo excited to see his Dad.

I'm so happy be here and I've decided this is quite a nice family I have.  Sam is a pretty good baby, although he has his kinks.  Jarod is the best ever.  Only he could understand when I say "I'm going to drink this glass of wine and pass out.  You have to put Sam to sleep" and just say "Wow, that's a big cup...but you deserve it."

It's been a sweet trip so far, Sam lights up every time he sees his dad.  I take this as a good sign.  Only a few more years until Jarod starts embarrassing Sam on the reg!

Did you know?  The name "marathon" comes from the Greek city Marathon where war messenger ran (without stopping) 26.2 miles to deliver a message saying the Persians had been defeated... then collapsed and died.

Sammyyyy

Looks like it's grocery store time!

Sammy is starting veggggies! Yum!  Actually, I've never fed him veggies.  Grandmother Dearest has taken over that responsibility.  I'm really not sure how this is going to work.  My mom is pretty set on making his baby food and I don't own a blender.  I think we'll probably get a doggie bag with baby food for the weekends.  Faaaantastic.  I honestly haven't had time with Sam where he's been up for longer than 10 minutes.  The Pham house wears him out as much as it does for me.  I swear, he lets out a sigh of relief every time we walk in the door (that is, if he's still awake)  I miss my Sammy terribly.  I'm glad it's almost Friday.  That's Mommy/Sammy PJ day!

Sammy and I had a great Valentine's Day.  Mommy had a couple glasses of wine, we got to see Daddy on our Skype Sesh, and I had dinner with my BFF Britt over the phone (not so sure she realized it).  As I promised many, here are some "extras" from our V-day shoot for this year's Valentine's day card:

I think I might have the cutest little boy evaaa.


Did you know? It's a bad idea to taunt a crocodile by sticking your tongue out at him... he can't and I'm sure it'd make him really mad.  You should never make a crocodile anger.

The Lie that Created the Conscience.

Before I start putting together my presentation on the Ukrainian Revolution, I should probably address the lie that was originally a funny thought on my Facebook.

My birthday is July 15th.

I happen to be reminiscing with my BFF Brittni about birthdays on FB.  Every year, I get Happy Birthdays from people I haven't talked to, people I don't know and of course (the minority) people that are my real (by real I mean, people I actually know) on Facebook.  While I do get a good amount of birthday comments, compared to the amount of people I "know" it's actually quite a small amount.  I decided that this week, I would change my birthday to every day of the week.  Just to see how many people would catch on aaand to see if anyone knows when my birthday is.  As Brittni giggled, I changed my birthday.  ha ha.  Whatever.  This morning, I, of course, got the notifications.  Instant shame.

The people that said happy birthday?  People who just just met not more than 3 months ago and don't actually know when my birthday is.  (Except Kaley, who should know better.  I'll blame your scrambled med student mind)  Great.  I make fantastic impressions.  I'm sorry, I'm a jerk.   I texted (game dayyy) Jarod about this.... his response? You are a bitch. Mmmm tttthaaanks husband.  hahaha.  Anyway, as one of the people that knows me best, and as my active human conscience, he pointed out that not everyone keeps an address book with birth dates in it and has memorized birthdays of friends since middle school (actually pre-school... Sara Bailer (prounounced Sawa Baiwer) : January 19th cha ching!) As Jarod would point out, I'm a bitch and a weirdo.  I should really start checking with him before I do things.  Maybe it's Jarod, maybe it's the mother in me, but seriously, lying isn't as fun as it can be at the bar.

I wanted to write a different funny post this week, but I really felt bad even though it's Facebook.  (Honestly, its not like I changed my birth certificate)  Jarod made me feel really bad.

I'll write again after I make the best powerpoint ever.

Maybe.

Did you know? Here's a Valentine's Day fact for you:  Contrary to the belief of many, Valentine's Day is a really holiday that commemorates St. Valentine.  The guy was a martyr.  In Roman times, it was illegal to be Christian, let alone be married in the Christian church.  Guess who did it?  That's right, St. Valentine himself.  There's a massacre, a feast in recognition of it, eventual miracles... the details of this are fuzzy because I learned this in 3rd grade.  Anyway, it is a holiday about love and an actual guy named Valentine.  Truth or not, celebrate with your lovey tomorrow and don't worry about the details and have a great Fun day Sunday!

By the way, Sweetest Day is fake.

The first step is to admit you have a problem

Hello... my name is Vi and I'm addicted to procrastination.

Sooo, this is awkward.  I haven't written a post in like, 2 weeks and I'm sure everyone thought that I had given up on it....like every other diary I've ever tried to keep.  My older sister was so good at it.  She has probably written volumes of journals, and I was always jealous.  I honestly feel bad for everyone that started reading this and has now, probably, given up.

Here's my excuse.  I decided, in my head, that I would write an entry once a week instead of everyday.  School has been a little more of a headache than I originally planned, but no biggie.  Every Saturday was my goal.  Wellll, good old Jarod was on All Star Break and decided to make a little road trip to Oxford, Ohio.  Let me tell you why this upsets me.

About a month ago, I found out that Jarod had a longer break where he could come visit.  Of course I jumped on the computer and found a roundtrip airline ticket for under 200 dollars.  A-mazing.  Except, Jarod made me choose between Sam and me coming down during my Spring Break for 9 days or Jarod coming for 2.  So I made my decision and went about my life.  Keep in mind, this break occurred about a month into school and I had finally gotten into a routine with everything.  I thrive on routine.  I'm a robot.  If anything is out of sync, I get very frazzled and it's hard to get back in the groove.  Well, Jarod drops a bomb two Saturdays ago... "You should probably go to the grocery store because I'm coming to see you."  ughhh.

Don't get me wrong.  I LOVED Jarod's visit.  It was a great surprise, Sammy was so excited to see his Daddy, and I got one more day with the love of my life.  But, it was 18 hours here and back (just driving, not with his stops)  and about 20 hours with us.  I felt really bad for him, but he apparently didn't mind doing it, so more power to him.  He's crazy, but I love his crazy.

So I didn't really realize how busy I've been with school until last week.  I think Jarod made me hit a brick wall with his visit and everything caught up around me.  I was kinda in a daze, just trying to get things done when I could and never really thought about how I went about doing them.  Now I'm laying in my bed, glasses of wine and coffee on every available surface and no pants on.  I'm a mess.  I've stopped putting away the laundry that I do, and just keep them in the baskets and use what I need.  Honestly, why did they invent drawers?  I find opening them to be inconvenient.  Jarod hates this about me.  The first time he came to my apartment when we started dating, he said, "Would you like me to help you clean?"  I had been cleaning for like, 2 hours.  My stuff was in neat stacks on the floor and I was proud of myself.  I instantly felt like a big fail. hahaha.

Sammy is growing up.  It saddens me every night as I now sleep alone.  He's decided that he wants to be in his own bed in his own room now.  Of course, Sammy can't talk or make real decisions on his own, but every time I carry him past his bedroom door, he cracks up and gets so excited.  It's the mobile.  (I'm about to throw it away.)  He loves seeing it circle above his head as it plays that stupid lullaby song.  I don't even understand how it helps him sleep.  I'm obvi jealous.  But seriously...  what baby just decides he would rather sleep alone AND all night?  Aren't they supposed to be very whiney and upset about being alone?  He's so weird.

I'm sure I have a lot more to say, but it's on to the next thing on my to do list.  Hopefully I'll write sooner than 2 weeks from now.

Did you know? The horn of a rhino is made of compacted hair?

Classroom Antics

Right now, I'm sitting in the hallway of my secretly hidden classroom in Upham watching my classmates try and find the room, not see where it is, and walk the other direction.  Do I recognize these people from lecture?  I think so, but I can't be certain because I'm not wearing my glasses.  Should I ask them if they're in the same class as me to direct them to the correct room?  Probably.  But I probably won't.

My fave part of college? Making people uncomfortable.  I never do it intentionally, but if I don't, someone usually will do it to me.  Hence the problems of Day 1.  I was too friendly with my professor, then he made fun of me in front of everyone.  I would have been better off pretending I couldn't speak english well.

Never take classes with friends.  Until last year, I never took a class with anyone I knew.  Idle conversation is not something that impresses the professor, and I would probably listen even less than I already do.  Also, there are certain expectations that people have of me in the classroom that I just wouldn't be able to meet.  Then you always have to share your answers or summarize last nights readings...do it yourself fool!  I like you, but not that much.  Last year, I stupidly allowed myself to take a class with Jarod.  I'll be honest.  It was a good excuse to be able to hang out more and do homework together.  Then, he wouldn't show up, or wouldn't show up on time (biggest pet peeve ever).  It would make me embarrassed because he already talked to me in class, and I was associated with him.  Later in the semester, he pulled out a newspaper and started reading it when class had started.  Then, every time we'd have a quiz or exam, I'd hear "What'd you get?"  If I did better, he couldn't believe it because I hardly studied, but if I didn't do as well, I should have studied more instead of play on the internet.  Lose-Lose. While it was nice to have lunch with someone three days a week (SWIPE!) I hated what I had to deal with to get some company.

Don't make friends with people in class.  Long long ago (like, for real) when I was a freshman, I tried to make friends with people in my classes.  One time I walked up to a girl and said "Did you know we have 3 classes together?"  She was weirded out.  We ended up being lab partners and hung out a couple times, but after the semester was over, she never called me or returned my calls (no text messaging at the time) Did I feel like a scorned lover?  Um yes.  Lesson learned, I never made a friend in class again.  I did all of the work and had all of the ideas and she just took them.  Not fun.  She ruined my chances of actually making friends.  Hence only having like 4 friends from college.

Look fancy in the first week.  I make a point to comb my hair, dabble a lot of make up on, and pick my clothes out the night before.  Why do I do this when I don't even want to make friends?  Because some classes have group projects and I don't want to be stuck with the weirdos.  Looking nice, but not too nice says, "Hey, I care about myself.  I'm cool.  I do well in school."  I hate when they do the "count off" for groups.  Hey Teacher!  Just let me pick

Be Prepared.  Classroom participation is usually around 10% of the final grade.  While that seems little, you'll find out, like Jarod did his senior year, that's a whole letter grade.  I have found that I can skim readings, find a few important things, then get into that classroom and raise my hand as fast as I friggin' can and then I'm done.

Stay away from the Asians I know what you're thinking, but if you know me, you know. I freaking hate Asian people.  They never look or seem normal, they're always doing something weird.  Don't even make eye contact or be nice, or you'll be in Biology class trying to look at algae while some girl keep poking you in the back asking you what words mean on her electronic translator. Yes it happened.

In every other part of my life, becoming a mom has really helped me gain some sort of social life, because now all people ask me about is Sammy.  No prob, I can do that.  Apparently school is no different than before, except I'm 10x as not cool as I was before.

Did you know?  Texas is completely independent in creating their own energy source?

Back to School! Back to School... To Show My Dad I'm Not a Fool!

Soo, it's been awhile!  It's a little because I've been trying to get everything straightened out before school started (still not done) and mostly because I've had a hard time trying to think of a "Did you know?" Still can't think of one, but we'll see what I've got by the end of this.

Yesterday was the first day of school. Blah.  It was cold and I was tired.  Today was a pretty big bust.  I tried to be an orderly mother, but that just doesn't work very well for me. Sammy messes up my routine.  I had to try three times to wake him up and every time I would get "ehhhhh" and he'd kinda roll over to get away from me.

My first professor thinks he's a stand up comedian.  There are about 20 of us in a huge lecture hall, and he stands on his stage and tries to make jokes through his microphone. His jokes were not funny.  Then he showed these film clips that were horrible.  I almost walked out of the class. In my capstone, I got called out by a fellow student.  The professor asked if anyone had classes with other people in the class and everyone said no.  One guy said "Yes. With her" and pointed right at me.  Seriously had no idea who he was.  My teacher tried to make it better and said "Well, maybe it was a big class" he follows with "Nope, there were like 7 of us and I sat behind her." Wellll. Sorry. I'm obviously not observant.  Whatev.  I was pregnant. Let's just say I was in a 9 month daze and can't remember anything from that period.

I also found out that the hole in the thumb of my mittens is not one of those holes that allows you to use your fingers. It's broken.  But that's OK.  I lost them today anyway.  No idea where they are and my hands were cold.  Good news is, I didn't lose my hat because HOLY SNOW!  It's crazy out today.  I wanted to see snow so bad when I was in Texas.  Now, as a trek through the wintery tundra in my Aldo snow boots, I want to kill myself.  I get hot out there.  The problem is, if I don't wear tights under my pants and two pairs of socks, I freeze, but then, after walking to the buildings and climbing at least 2 flights of stairs, I'm sweating like a pig.  As we speak, I have a heat headache.  And I have to read like 4 books in a week.  hahahha Good luck to me!

Sammy has pretty much been up since 4 and so have I.  He hates me.  He just wanted to play.  Ughhh.  I was so tired, I drank coffee (lots of cream, lots of sugar.) And still managed to just sit at a four way stop until someone honked at me to go.  My bad!  Then I got to class like, a half hour early, because I like to get a good seat.  My professor came in and asked me if "This was HST 330" He preceded to call me out on coming to class early during role call when I introduced myself.  Everyone laughed at me.  Seriously. It was like being in a seventh grade twilight zone. (I wasn't made fun of in middle school. I was cool) You would have thought I was wearing my underwear on the outside of my pants.

Good News?  Second class was cancelled today.  yayy!

Did you know:  The best way to get bubble gum out of your hair is with peanut butter?  One time, I tried to put gum behind my ear like Violet on Willy Wonka's Chocolate Factory.  Not a good idea.  All up in my hair.  The oils from the peanut butter takes the sticky out like a charm.

New Addition!

By popular request (Brittni's Dad and Jarod)  I've decided to add a "Did You Know?/Guess What I Learned" to all of my posts.  I think I'll probably end each post with something from my Fun Fact Memory Bank.  Here's one inspired by my trip to the Alamo, but something I learned in the 8th grade:

There are two legends to how Davey Crockett spent his last moments alive:

1. Most people like to say he died fighting, battling off the Mexicans and was a true hero.
2. Others say the Mexican soldiers found him cowering in a room and begged for his life.

Either way, the Mexis killed him and "Remember the Alamo" helped the anger the United States into acquiring the area of Mexico now known as Texas.