Mommies and the Future of Vi...Palmer?

Happy Mother's Day!!

Soo, being a mommy now, I get another reason to celebrate all my goodness. Sammy can't show his appreciation through gifts or anything right now, but his cuddling has been the best gift he could give me every day!  Maybe, when he grows up, we can cuddle everyday on Mother's Day for 15 minutes.  Weird? Yes.  Will I ask him to do it when he's 15 and probs hating me?  Yes.

Tell me how you really feel, Sam

Everyone says they have the best mother in the world.  You know what?  I've got 3... and not in that lesbionic way.  My mom is perfect, best cook EVER, a little crazy, fun, and extremely loving (even though she covers it up with a bit of racism and judging).  She's been the reason for sooo many of my fantastic stories and honestly, is the reason why Sam was the baby he was when he was born, as well as the bratty little smart fella he is today.  I learned at to be a mom from her, for better or for worst (It's probably where I get my "SAMMAAAYYY!! STOP IT!" even though he doesn't understand how to listen right now anyway.)  Even though, sometimes, it seems like she is trying to steal my child, I love her dearly.

Momm-eeee

Wherever my mom has skipped moments, as we all do, I've had my sisters.  Yes, we fight, yes we bicker, yes, we talk behind each other's backs.... but I also do that with my mom, like everyday.   They seriously take care of me like they are moms.  They give me advice, steer me in the right direction, and scold me when I've done something wrong.  They don't just do it to make me feel bad (although sometimes... maaaybe) but they do it because they feel the need to take care of me and all my crazy messups.  Their instinct to do that is so much more than on a sister level, they care for me like I'm their baby.  and I love it!  They aren't moms yet, not even close, but one day, they're kids are going to be so crazy and fun and loving, it'll be insane!

Maybe I have a skewed view of what a mommy should be, but I wouldn't have my mommies be any other way, and I could never be another other type of mom.

What a big 12-15 months I've had!  I can't believe everything I've done.  After graduation, my little sister asked me "Are you glad it's done?"  As a mom would, I replied "When you have a kid, you'll realize, you're never done."  Finishing school just opened the door to so many other things that I have to do.  Now I'm a full time mommy, who is planning her wedding (weird, and out of order), planning on moving to God knows where, and then being a wife.  When it mix it all together, some of the jobs I will do will over lap so it'll be NBD.   But when you list it all out, it seems like a lot.  But seriously, any mommy that complains or tries to gain sympathy through all the work she has to do, shouldn't be a mom.  It's a thankless job!  GET USED TO IT ALREADY!!

So, as I thought, graduation was kind of a bummer.  Reason 357 of why I didn't want to go.  Jarod wasn't here, obvi, and I think the College of Arts and Science had THE worst speakers ever. ("In the film, the Kings Speech..." Sorry I still can't get over that)  I texted through the entire ceremony that lasted longer than it took to park.  I wish I had bought one of those electronic gaming systems.  On top of that, my parents missed them saying my name out loud (leading them to believe I didn't really graduate jk jk) and I hated that stooopid hat!!!  On a funny note, in the first half of the ceremony, Sammy started crying and I HEARD him.  I texted my sister and asked if Sammy just freaked out, and she said yes.  I recognized his cry? Whoa.  My BFF Brittni did a pub crawl in my honor, because I obvi don't have the alcoholic strength or energy to do it anymore.  How fantastic is she?

Graduation... I'm in the back

My fake degree

After all this was done, all I could think about was the future.  What AM I going to do?  My dad has given me several suggestions, and when it came down to it, we realized we needed a miracle.  Every choice I have right now, has at least one consequence to go with it.  There is no perfect route for me.  Somehow, my life choices has left me in a rut.  Every way you look at it, I will be taking a serious consequence down the road, and the only thing I can really do is pick what will keep my family (Jarod, Sammy and Me) together at this point.  Do you know what they call that?  Mommy Sacrifice.  Again, it's thankless and you just have to do it.  Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy to do what I can for my family, but at the same time, I can't help but think that somewhere, down the line, I made the wrong decision, and now, I'm kind of lost.  

  

All that's left is to pray for an answer.  I have to rely on something, much larger than myself, to help me take care of my family and guide me in the right direction.  As always, I can't wait to be led down this blind road to see what happens.  Obvi I'll write, and obvi I'm hoping for a reality show.

Check ya lata!